


Tragedy Loves Company

by winter_angst



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Confusion, Mind Control Aftermath & Recovery, Other, Past Relationship(s), low calorie angst, sad steeb
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-01
Updated: 2019-12-01
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:26:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21623725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/winter_angst/pseuds/winter_angst
Summary: Some days are better than others but Steve still clings to the hope that one day, everything will be better.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Steve Rogers
Comments: 4
Kudos: 13





	Tragedy Loves Company

Some are destined with tragedy in their blood. It's fate and there wasn't anything that could be done about it.

Bucky Barnes was one of those people. But he was resilient. God, Steve often thought, did Bucky defy all odds. If anyone deserved a break it was Bucky and that was Steve's job. To shelter him, care for him, nurse him back to the man he was — or as close as they could get, everything considered. 

When Steve thought about it that way, it was easier to be optimistic. He could swallow down that bitter taste and shrug off the grayish blue eyes boring holes into him. On good days, the emotion was curiosity. Bucky would ask questions in a soft voice and flinch as if he expected to be punished for them. "Who are you?" he would always lead with. The following questions were either variations of "What's my mission?" and "Why am I here?" 

Steve always did his best to answer. His mind was healing and he would remember. He remembered his name, turned his head at the sound of it head cocked to the side like Lucky did whenever someone dared rustle food packaging around him. 

Other times, Bucky looked angry. It wasn't threatening but there was a deepest loathing and Bucky did not ask questions. He voiced demands. "I require hydration Steve." or "What am I to do now, Steve?" and the favorite as of late, "Can't you stop staring at me for two goddamn seconds Steve?"

He would sneer as if his name was sin incarnate or something particularly foul he was being forced to swallow. Patience was necessary but Steve was only human. He had a breaking point. The last one ground on him particularly because Steve wasn't staring at him. He could be in the other room and Bucky would snarl it out anyway. 

"I'm not even in the living room," Steve called back, shaking he jar of coffee beans. They were imported because Tony insisted no one in the Tower drink subpar coffee. It personally offended him.

"I know you have your eyes in the walls."

Bucky was paranoid. That was expected. Steve asked Tony disable Jarvis from their floor and Tony said 'sure thing Capsicle'. After a few months without Jarvis' voice Steve expected that to go away. It didn't. "I don't," he said because what the hell was he supposed to say.

"I'm not a liar." Steve jumped. His hearing was sensitive but Bucky still managed to catch him by surprise. It made him think of Brooklyn when they shared that tiny apartment. Bucky was always clomping around. "I'm not stupid. You're watching me. You're always watching me Steve."

Steve breathed deeply trying to settle his galloping pulse. "I'm not," he swore again. "Really Bucky. Why would I?"

Bucky peered at him and Steve's skin felt hot. What would he accuse him of? Their past was just that: the past. He didn't expect him to fall into his arms and kiss him because that was too long ago. Bucky wasn't ready and Steve wasn't ready. He couldn't even think of him in the same way, as awful as it sounded. Not with that metal arm and the red star reminding him of everything Bucky had suffered. 

"I don't know," Bucky looked away suddenly. 

His voice quieted down from his anger and his body sagged a bit on his left side. He had metal inside of him and the weight was a significant burden according to Tony. Nothing his super soldier body could manage but it could be taxing. Steve only saw him in such a vulnerable state when he was confused. He preferred those days and the way that Bucky ambled a few feet behind him. "What are you doing?" Once he realized that Steve wasn't going to punish him, he unleashed a flurry of questions. 

Bucky's eyes flashed to him and his body went back to it's rigid state of defense. "Stop watching me Steve." Bucky spit and stalked back to the living room where he then shouted, "What am I to do?"

Just another day, Steve thought tiredly. But it would all be worth it once Bucky was back. These days would mean nothing; he wouldn't look at Steve like he something filthy picked up on his shoe.

It would all be okay eventually.


End file.
